a weekend of fun

It’s so funny that less then a week ago I was in the middle of a meltdown of epic proportions. These borderline mood swings are exhausting to say the least. In time I think the riding of the waves will get easier and this break in mood came quicker then the last time so maybe that is progress.

I woke up this morning with full intention of working out lol but decided I didn’t feel like it 🙂 I will be up at 5:30 in the morning to get back on the bike before work. Last night I became so overcome with my painting when I woke up I wanted to continue to work on it. I honestly am loving the way it turned out. I have decided to entitle it “Down the Rabbit Hole”.

Down The Rabbit Hole

I wish the details showed up more. It’s mixed media: Acrylic and pastels and it has a lot of depth…the light in the middle is a lot more detailed too. It’s not like a lot of my other stuff and I look forward to hearing what people like (or don’t like) about it. I’ll probably bring it into work and ask my co-workers what they think of it. J has such a great eye when it comes to art and I always look forward to her critiques 🙂

This is the progress I have made on the piece I have posted before. The shooting stars represent two people in my life who passed suddenly and meant so much to me.

Night Sky

Alright I have to go and get my laundry from the laundromat so I will get down to tonight’s meditation and my reflections on it 🙂
I really hope you are all enjoying them, it’s been nice to share them with the world I guess 🙂

Take the Pressure Off

Sometimes we need a little pressure to get moving, but sometimes we put too much pressure on ourselves. I must do this, we think, and I must do it better and faster. We begin to believe that only by worry and fear and pressuring ourselves can we get the job done – whether the job is spiritual growth, making a particular decision, or accomplishing a task.

That kind of pressure doesn’t get the job done any better or faster. It simply makes you tense and fearful, and stops the creative juices. Too much pressure can take you out of the present moment. It can inhibit the life force, the flow of life within you. That kind of pressure can make so much noise in your mind that you can’t hear your heart.

We have responsibilities. We have time frames and commitments to others. And there are times when we need to get the job done. But the most pressing job can be done best when we’re relaxed. The most urgent decision can be made most clearly when we’re at peace. It doesn’t help to force ourselves to go faster, be somewhere else, or be someone we’re not. There are few things we need to do that can be enhanced by becoming tense, fearful, and worried. The more pressing the situation, the more pressing the need to be present for ourselves, and be present for each moment.

Let off some stream. Release your emotions. Clear the pathway to the heart. The answer will come. The job will get done.

Give yourself some relief. Take the pressure off.

Taken from ‘Journey to the Heart’ by Melody Beattie

Truth. Truth. And More truth.

I am learning how to accept this and try and apply it. I am working hard at trying to take more time for me, to try and stop myself from trying to do everything right all the time. In life and therapy I am learning about releasing my emotions and not let myself get all caught up in the pressure. I went outside my comfort zone today – I went out by myself, I took in the owls and the hawks and felt the cool crisp air and walked on the nature trails alone. I looked for hearts in nature. I painted all weekend. I rekindled something with that newest piece. I don’t know what and I don’t fully know what it represents BUT I do know that I actually like it.

I want to apply this to work more – I have been working SO hard and I think it is really paying off. I want to be able to NOT want to be the best at everything, to have everything be right all the time heck EVERY time. I need to cut myself some slack and know that I am doing everything I can and that my best is good enough. I have a hard time grasping the concept that my best is good enough but I am trying like hell to get to a point where I fully believe it.

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3 thoughts on “a weekend of fun

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